Well for the past 2 weeks I’ve attempted to write a column about
this matchup. How about a five point
rationale on why this team or that team will win. Big fuckin deal; who hasn’t done that? No I want to write something original. Ok; so how about a stupid first person narrative
where I pretend I’m at their morning skate around or something. Well the thing is I have nothing to really
say that would either be the least bit funny or insightful. Trust me I tried several times to make it
work. Ok so how about a pep talk speech
in writing mixed with a few prayers that I made up. Well I found out my rhyme scheme is terrible
and I’m really not that creative. Wait what about a story where Sidney Crosby is some sort of demon who only gets stronger by the amount of tears he sheds and the amount of dicks in his mouth. That's a good start, but I don't know what I would do with it. So what’s
left?
How about something from the heart. Ok here we go.
For the past 2 weeks I was sick to my stomach trying to
think of a reason how the Flyers could win.
Hockey is the most team sport out of any of the big four. But still the two best players on the ice are
wearing Penguins sweaters. Despite
Giroux’s masterful season, Malkin’s was better and Crosby despite his overall
faggyness is the best player in the world.
Their goalie is better, they have more experience, and despite my love
of Lavvy, you’d have to say that Shero is a better coach. As my Dad would say; you’re only as good as
the amount of rings on your fingers. So then
how do I prove the Flyers are better?
Well it turns out I don’t have to. The Flyers just did.I forgot that the NHL playoffs are all about heart, a hot goalie and toughness. And these Flyers are just tougher. Seriously this team is filled with Rooster Cogburn's (hence the title).
My grandmother is in the hospital today( no big deal) so I missed the first period and a half of last night’s game. But when I turned it on it was 3-0. So I changed channel in disgust and just in time to catch the Phillies offensive boom. Seriously I didn’t know we would score five runs in an inning all year. But anyway I flipped back and it was 3-1. And despite being down two I knew we were going to win that game.
The first period was to be expected, unfortunately. This team always starts slowly, ALWAYS! The first period was brutal; the puck was not
bouncing our way. Both the second and third
goals were more a combination of fluke and luck than skill. And our young guys finally seemed like young
guys.
But from the middle of the second period through overtime we
were dominate. Our fore checking was devastating;
players were flying up the ice winning every, and I mean every, battle along
the boards. The defensemen were able to
keep the puck in the offensive zone or crash down and extend scoring opportunities. And slowly but surely you could feel the
sphincters of every player and fan in the building start to tighten up. They weren’t attacking, they weren’t forcing
the issue and they certainty weren’t establishing either Malkin or Crosby.
But getting back to my original point; I forgot about
toughness. I forgot that Danny Briere
always comes to play in April. I forgot
why we traded Mike Richards for a couple of kids. And I forgot that we traded
for guys to take Chris Pronger’s place.
Danny Briere had a terrible season, for his standards. He
scored only 16 goals and didn’t have 50 points all season (wow really!?) But that dude is a playoff warrior. His first goal was orgasmic. In the shootout he’s the only guy who does
what I would do. You know like if I could
skate, shoot or grow a proper beard (although Briere can’t do that last
one). But skate down the ice and rather
than the deke and duck just wrist it stick side. And that’s what he did in front of a sprawled
Fluery who looked like a wounded deer. And
then in the third the old saying came into play. Get the puck on net and good things will
happen. So after Schenn won the puck
behind the net gave it to Briere in the circle who skimmed it along the ice and
somehow it went in. Thank Crosby for the
perfect screen, but credit Briere for doing what coaches tell kids from when
they first start skating.
Speaking of Schenn.
For the last 2 weeks of the season he was arguably our best player. For a long time he seemed a little lost. Much like JVR, he didn’t seem to totally know
how to use his size and speed and was a little lackadaisical. But now he is always in the right place on
offense. That check by Crosby and his retaliation
cemented his legacy in Philadelphia, but it also seemed to give him some extra
motivation. That third goal, credit
Hartnell for the perfect slap pass, but Schenn deserves all the praise for
keeping his stick on the ice.
And then of course my favorite new Flyer; Nick Grosmann. That dude starts and finishes every
check. He clears the area around
Bryz. And he plays like he is 10 feet
tall. I am so happy we extended
him. And a little pissed we gave up so
much for Pavel Kubina. You need at least
four defenseman in a playoff series you can go to war with. With Timmonen, Coburn coupled with Grossmann
and Carle that’s a great blue line. Add
Lilja and if Mezzaros comes back that’s another two. And that doesn’t even count our forwards who
love to bang bodies like Hartnell, Simmonds, Rinaldo and Talbot. This team hits early, often and
effectively. By the third period I don’t
think Malkin touched the puck once or wanted to.
And finally let's not overlook the GM. Earlier in the season I made fun of Paul Holmgren for the
signing of Ilya Bryzgalov. But give the
man credit. In one year he brought in Schenn,
Jagr, Talbot,Simmonds, Courtier, Grossmann, Read, Wellwood and last night’s
hero Jakub Vorachek. All of those guys
played huge minutes and were more than up to the task. Holmgren took a huge risk jettisoning his two
star gigolos’ and remaking the team in Claude Giroux’s imagine. And so far it's working. Although I am rooting for the Kings in the
West.
But I’m getting ahead of myself. The Flyers could still lose in five, six or seven
games. Bryz while good in the second and
third period, was only good because he wasn’t really tested in those
periods. The Flyers are still smaller on
offense, with the less skilled players and now maybe they’re a little too overconfident. But after watching last night’s it's obvious who plays with more heart.
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